Seeker of Thrones 5-41
“Prince Kassardis knew his three wives were cunning and vicious in equal measure, and the journey ahead would be hard and grueling. Therefore the very first thing he did was to seek out the Very Wise Frog, which lived on a nearby hill known as King’s Rock. The road to the Frog was well worn by pilgrims, so it was not a hard climb for Kassardis, who wore his fine leather boots, but it was steep.
“Very Wise Frog,” said Kassardis, when he reached the summit, “This brutal life is like a steel cage. My father’s kingdom is built on the stacked bodies of his officers. He sups on blood. His surviving wife picks his gray hairs and pushes toy soldiers around from her sedan.”
“Your father’s kingdom is very large,” said the Very Wise Frog.
“I will escape my own blood,” said the resolute Kassardis, “And flee to the land of Samura, where their cities are built on covenants of peace and no blood is shed unjustly. The journey is long and hard, so please give me some advice, as my family has treated you well.”
“Samura is a myth told to small children to comfort them,” said the Very Wise Frog, “Your wives are much faster than you and will catch up to you, then beat you savagely before returning to the time honored ritual of trying to murder each other.”
The Prince was aghast. “I refuse this life of violence!” he said.
“Violence is inescapable,” said the Very Wise Frog.
“Don’t gloat at me, frog!” said the Prince, “My trial is only just beginning. Surely you have some other advice for me?”
“No,” said the Very Wise Frog.
“Frog!” said Kassardis, growing panicked, “What do you mean by ‘violence is inescapable’?
“It is,” said the Frog.
“You’re a liar!” said Kassardis.
“No, I am not,” said the Frog, “Nor have I ever been. Violence is inescapable. Inseparable from life itself. Permanent. It is fixed in your cosmology. Forever. I could go on, but that’s besides the point.”
At this Kassardis was so enraged that he threw the Frog off the summit of the mountain. It bounced of a cliff and split like a wet melon, dying instantly, and posthumously proving its point to Kassardis.
Kassardis, for his part, wept.
Ah yes, space bullshit, like time bullshit, but confusing in a way where you can’t just shrug and go ‘guess it’s wibbly wobbly timey wimey’ and wing it.
Aye, at least Time Bullshit has the decency to wash over you, and do all the work itself. You’ll get to the other shore eventually. No need to overthink it.
Space Bullshit must be actively navigated, it’s innumerable, recursive labyrinths trudged through before relative safety can be found. It’s annoying as hell.
Designing such is all fun and games until you loose track of some of the bits and pieces and forget where you put the loo.
F I V E
N A S T Y
B O Y S
Love me some dirty, rowdy, nasty boys!
just, nasty rowdy boys
STOP
GIVE ME A BEAT
C R E A T E
S I X
B I L L I O N
M O N S T E R S
Traps and dragon.
Hoard and roles assigned.
Here we have a dungeon
Oh a plundering we will go…
The boss is load-bearing.
This is axiomatic.
That table is only lacking the dice.
Ooooh, the heretics court. I’m even deeper into this.
True peace is a lie, and justice a luxury. The sooner the Prince accepts this, the sooner he can attempt to change it.
Classic Kassardis!
The secret wisdom is that the Very Wise Frog accepted violence, and thus, his death, in peace.
Wise perhaps. But not wise enough. Only fools are angry at death, but the wise fight it with claw and tooth, digging and hiding, running and jumping…with every weapon at their disposal until their very last wheezing breath. Surrendering to death and overwhelming odds gives you nothing of value.
In many pieces even.
“There is no great gain without great risk” Those who speak these words usually are the lucky surviving few
Yre is a death trap. It’s fractal. Timelord technology. There’s infinite space inside.
Well as long as there’s no Daleks inside, they should be alright.
I wonder what the Hausdorff dimension is. Probably around 3.3, I would guess.
this didn’t fall
on deaf ears, 52
Back in business, indeed.
Five is a truthsome number of nasty-boys. Any more and the rowdiness escalates to outright unruliness.
Or, heaven forbid, rancor.
Five nasty boys?
Take care of the things ye wish, Ciocie, lest you end up with a retinue of useless oozing pale devils.
“I’m choosing the goddamn nicknames next time!”
Don’t you think guys that Oscar looks like Chris Fehn from Slipknot? At least his nose…
Yea im glad i was lnt the only one that thiught that
Don’t you thing, guys, that Oscar looks like Chris Fehn from Slipknot?At least his nose…
Dungeon crawl! Dungeon crawl!
Megadungeon!
No, METAdungeon.
Seasoned life tip: If somebody invites you to go to Hell, tell them to go first. Or make them go first. With a sword-tip.
That’s fantastic advice. If I may offer an amendment,
If somebody invites you to go to Heaven, tell them to go first. Or make them go first. Try a spear this time.
With infinite space an infinite time Mammon has done naught but grow complacent. What a shame.
That’s certainly what he wants you to think.
What’s better than a proper, old-style dungeon? A motherfucking fractal dungeon!
The Very Wise Frog might have ben a bit of an ass, but I don’t think he deserved that.
I am sensing that this tale is like something out of the KSBD version of Grimm’s fairy tales. The way the Brothers Grimm had it, though, was if that you stepped out of line suffering and death awaited you.
I wonder how a fairy tale would play out where violence is a virtue? Let’s watch.
(Oh, there’s something about a heist going on in the colorful nonsense above, I guess, but I can’t be bothered to comment on that when the red text has suddenly become so interesting…)
Politoed no
The Frog was not Very Wise. Being right is not enough. Also, was it right?
Government monopolies cannot deliver violence as cheaply and efficiently as the free market can. So, a state monopoly can make violence rare and expensive.
Is this an escape? A useless semantic argument.
I think in this cosmology, the Frog is, by definition, correct regarding violence.
Samura might not be a myth, as “good” places seem to exist in the multiverse, though only right before they are ruined. So if Samura does exist, Kassardis will ruin it, probably by having his wives chase him there, though very possibly with a more clever twist than that.
Is not Alyson’s world part of this cosmology? Yet you are right, it may be conquered soon.
For what purpose beyond escape was the useless semantic argument conjured, after all.
It is against YISUN. For darkness is the natural state of caverns, and it is light that is violent.
Join us at the bloodstone fortress! Quench the light! END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END EN D THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END THE END
Wisdom is wasted on most of the 777,777 realms. Many are too caught up in the lie that was first told, many more are caught up in their own lies. Fate, the greatest Lie; tends to insure itself toward the most assured path of demise.
Thus I am glad I am a greater liar than Fate, for I have stolen mine away and placed it in a small box where oceans are the skies and the skies are the oceans. And where the ground flows like fire but fire is absolutely solid. An impossible place really.
I would rather nary be like Kassardis, poor; foolish, boy.
Living under the rule of force-monopolizing Leviathan is not any kind of escape from violence; it merely replaces the naked violence of barons and brigands with the veiled violence of bureaucrats and bankers.
Which Hell? Aren’t there many?
There are many thrones in the multiverse, but only one true Throne. In much the same way I suppose there are many lesser hells but only one true Hell.
My guess is that Hells are numbered depending on their importance and that “Hell” is how Hell 1 is commonly refered to.
DUNGEON TRUCK! DUNGEON TRUCK! DUNGEON TRUCK!
Five nasty boys that you might, y’know, not mind never seeing again.
Which hell? There’s at least 71 of them, to Al-YIS-UN’s knowledge.
So Yre is basically central bureaucracy from futurama?
…niiiice
Roguelike, even!
Cioelle
Dungeon Mistress
of my Dreams
Most confusing I find about Mammon is his great size, when others of his kind we’ve seen appear to top out at about the weight of a horse. Is this a function of his lifespan, or his magics? Does his species grow indefinitely, or did he simply conclude that his girth need match his horde to properly appreciate it?
The Kindly Men grow as they age; he is undoubtedly the oldest and greatest of them all. If one wishes to appreciate why more do not reach his elder status, one only has to look around the universe and appreciate it’s wholesome violence. Blessed is the world that allows only one dragon to make it to great wyrmhood.
The Frog knows that peace won’t last at any place the Prince tries to hide. Any peaceful refuge he finds will be destroyed by the violence of his people coming for him. So for him, violence is not something he can escape and peace is a fable. Even the act of finding death for himself will involve some violence. The Prince can’t catch a break.
Now Allison (= AL-YISUN = AL YS ATUN VARANMA PRESH = AL ANA = The I = The Ego = The Terrible Enemy of which Hell is an illusion) is going to hell to meet Himself (= Himself = Himself = Himself = Himself = …)
God, meet the Devil. I meet Himself.
A most marvelous meeting of opposites. Your equations illustrate the illusion of the separateness all things. Will a great old lie be undone or will a bevy on new ones spring forth to support the old failing one. Who knows what dreams my come of this healing.
This one is humbled by your erudition.
Thank you for sharing your insight. I will ponder long upon the final three words.
“I meet Himself.”
Exquisite.
K6BD drinking game: take a shot for every panel White Chain crosses her arms like a bouncer at a club.
82 sulking angel crosses their arms in disapprobation.
Obligatory reference to “The Cube”?
Out of all the movies in the multiverse not a bad choice.
Perhaps the its sequel: Hypercube, for Yre’s recursive spacial nature.
The first was the better effort.
when comes to organize a [suicide] mission, Ceo is CEO. [pun intended]
I heard “five nasty-boys” in Griffin McElroy’s voice.
Can’t wait to see the five
Your artstyle got infinitely more Araki, Abbadon.
Wait
we got a dragon
and a dungeon
ROLL FOR INITIATIVE
“They are absolute nutters.”
One of the best lines in the comic right here.
Didn’t know Throne had clicky pens 🙂
i thought the holy count was
1, 4, 10, 23, 57, 132, 301, 701, 1750
More like the holey count! I’m no scholar but I’m pretty sure you’re missing a bunch of numbers there.
I like Panel 3, very “Legends of the Hidden Temple”-ey
I find it interesting, that Oliver, renowned ‘rowdy boy’ who was perfectly willing to speak harshly to Al-Yis-Un, the Ascending Godking, obeyed the words of Princess.
I find myself wondering again how much status arises between the Devils based upon the size of the hot black flame which comprises them.
Princess and Cio are both former Ebons, and thus may be suspected to possess great, roaring flames of terrible capacity, regardless of the masks they wear.
I suspect there may be subtleties between the devils, based upon such things.
Also, I find Cio’s harrowed expression in the final view above to be most heartbreaking, a description I thought never to apply to a devil in any circumstance.
The poor little imp, so smitten of her Godking. She is driving herself in a fashion most cruel, to please the object of her barren affection. It is foolishness of course, the young Godking is unlikely to even notice, and yet, the black-hearted inamorata persists.
Love is truly a curse.
Hmm… I’m reminded of Lucy from Peanuts and the sign on her Doctor stand… The Doctor is: IN / OUT. Oscar has himself an Open sign on his belt ~ maybe “open for business”? At some point I hope to see the flip-side of his sign, maybe when he officially accepts the job. I’m sure he’ll charge much more than 5-cents though.
Did y’all notice that Oscar has laid all his cards on the table? Sure, they are MtG cards, but that little ol’ bottom card stickin’ out – that’s the sign for an ante card. Our boy Oscar plays for keeps.
Hmm… I would wager that is how Cio and Oscar met. Fan fic girl falls for closet nerd rebel boy over a hard core MtG game at the twice-annual Red City Comic-Con and 777,777 Worlds MtG tournament. I can just picture them riding off together on his chopper, leaving a trail of magic cards and little man-shaped cutouts behind them. They were so young and free then, before the pressures of Devilhood got to them. *sigh* It’s a bit cliche, but a romantic classic just the same.
KILL SIX BILLION NASTY BOYS