I have sold many a pie to this lady, methinks. I could be wrong, but I have a hunch. I apologize for not being definite–one does not look too deeply into the face of one who bears a Magus Gate if one would keep their spine intact.
If it is her, then this Pree Allison most voraciously enjoys a good opiumberry and sabertooth camel kidney pie between workouts.
do I have WHAT KIND OF PIE SELLER DO YOU TAKE ME FOR?
of COURSE I have blue-and-gold yolk pies, madame.
Or I would, if that fat slitfaced bastard Sivnrx didn’t just buy all my uncooked bluegold eggs for the express purpose of hurling them at that harridan Fifth Daughter of a Silk Merchant’s clothing shop.
Good hunting to him, I say, but that’s somewhat irrelevant as you are without a pie to pick yourself up with. I can either give you a rain check certificate or a fresh-smelted sulfuric quiche?
Thank you for the reminder, and I must say that it is good to hear that. My beautiful face, with skin made of marble and eyes of ivory, is not to be sat upon. Now, if you told me I couldn’t bury my face in jewelry, then that would be cause for concern.
is there some greater significance to her using that as her pull-up bar or is this one of those cases where pull-up bars were outlawed due to a combination of merchant guild shenanigans and the work of an obscure yet powerful cult, or is it both
“Do not affix exercise equipment in public places or causeways. Do not engage in activities obstructive to city traffic.” – Throne City Ordinance 1503:
“No metal piping structure shall be used in service of any function but the transportation of flame, fluid, and air, unless explicitly exempted by guild law or contract.” – Pipeworkers Guild By-law 390234:
“A martial artist worth his salt doesn’t settle for mere pull-up bars but only uses the remains of gods and his enemies. A real martial artist, of course, sees no distinction between the two.” – Hal Tho Mannok’s “Hardcore Guide to The Ways of Annilation and Tea”
There are surely more convenient, and less blasphemous, means of exercise, but one of the signs of ROYALTY is bowing before no one, not even the gods. And what better way is there to show one’s dominion over the divine than to get absolutely ripped exercising upon their corpses? That, I think, even Great Meti would approve of.
Foolish Servant. The Successor is heir to all which that goddess created, and more. Were she alive, she would doubtless feel honored to aid the Rising King in her ascension, in whatever small way.
Words of the wise: Yea, throweth not slurs at the crazy mofo performing one armed pullups upon the face of a dead god. For verily, they are a badass, and by their hand may deliver a swift end.
There’s probably like a dozen other places Allison could be doing that. But I suppose defiling the relics of the gods just for the hell of it must be a necessary step in the path to True Royalty…
To climb the skull of YS-Bey is, it is proven, a lethal endeavor.
It was this way with her garden, which nothing of nature could survive.
Only in the unnatural could death grow like a treasured flower.
The chain that the the great skull of the goddess is still wearing is equally great in its density, it seems, for even the full weight of the rising king using it for pull-ups is insufficient to make it tighten!
I can think of worse uses for my body post-experation. Frankly as long as it isn’t being used to hurt the living I’m not sure I would care, being dead and all. I could see people who respected me in life being a bit upset, but that is unfortunately a “their problem”, not mine, since I’d be dead and all. And there are far worse things than someone getting use out of my face piercings.
I’m curious how many times if any during the whole year we skipped that Allison went back to her world, maybe to do some laundry.
“Uhh who’s… armor… is this on the clothes line?”
Hey Abbadon, I just noticed that the two short chains connecting the ornament to the top chain are missing. One is plausibly blocked at least partially by Allisons arm, the other would be visible.
I love the comic, 🙂 I simply noticed it since it appeared different from the previous page and was like ‘is that the same skull?’, other than Allisons body blocking the central ornament itself.
It’s also possible that she disconnected them to move them out of the way (can’t tell on the previous page if that’s even possible)
It’s been one human year, which is an eyeblink to some beings out there. Those that are powerful know that the Key is carried by a human mortal. Therefore it would be difficult to get a workout without people noticing.
Defiling a goddess head is the last place they would expect her to be.
You know, I was initially hoping she’d start using the face as a punching bag, but this? This is sooooo much better. And the fact that she’s been doing this REGULARLY as well. ALYISUN really has changed, and not just physically.
As I understand it, Pree is a general honorific for women/females. Preem is the corresponding one for men/males. Maybe it means that certain amount of respect as been accorded beyond the name-only condition.
There is a particular draconic slur for humanity, which I share here because it amuses me:
“Ke vhi-dar”, meaning “he who grows flowers”. The reference is to a garden in Paradise where angels tend the gardens mortals left behind (doing the useless for the beautiful so we don’t have to). It is also a pun on “ke Tau’nar”, meaning “he who multiplies War”.
The Tau’nar-ri (war-maker demons) have been in favor of this nickname for millennia now.
One might expect to lift her own slight body is no exercise for the Heir of the Conquering King. However, a student of relativity will recognize that for the King to be pulled up is for the Wheel to be pushed down.
Don’t forget. Believe in yourself. Not in the you who believes in me. Not the me who believes in you. Believe in the you who believes in yourself.
.
.
.
PIERCE THE HEAVENS.. USING DRILLS! VIOLENTLY!
While yes, the Goddess is likely not using that, it’s still a pretty rude move to use it for exercise, especially as it clearly bothers a nearby worshiper. If all you’re looking for is a pull up bar… that can’t be terribly hard to find.
27 Simpering Coward Foolishly Wastes Time With Worthless Frivolities
Not if you want to get a cup at Throne’s Best Water-Based Stimulants afterwards. You have to bear in mind the whole picture, and not see actions in isolation.
Those of you who prefer blood-based stimulants might prefer a different god as an exercise wall.
Check your junk email folder – you may have missed the “No introductory payment, godly low monthly payments, free noodles” spam that went out last year.
I feel people are perhaps doing Alison a misservice here. Doing pull-ups on a bar improves your physical strength, but this isn’t a story about that. Doing pull-ups on the face of a goddess is different. Psyche is important here.
Tunnel ape, and connection to the conventional way of humans giving birth – exiting a ‘tunnel’, as it were.
As opposed to demons or angels which just kind of like, coalesce. And numerous other species which would lay eggs, or binary fission, or other, less explicable methods.
If Al-Yis-Un is doing one-armed pullups, then either the chain she’s clinging to is welded into a single inflexible mass AND she’s working hard to keep her body vertical, or something else is wrong. Her center of mass is nowhere near underneath the point she’s suspending herself from.
If she’s practicing rock-climbing then she’s picked an easy face to traverse.
If she’s practicing annoying the neighbors, she’s spot on.
Hmm… Arturia Pendragon >> Allison, I am calling it. The reference is Fate Zero. There must be some kind of noble bloodline in Allison. Cannot just go from zero to hero in, err, days? Cannot even tell time in these dimensions either.
I have sold many a pie to this lady, methinks. I could be wrong, but I have a hunch. I apologize for not being definite–one does not look too deeply into the face of one who bears a Magus Gate if one would keep their spine intact.
If it is her, then this Pree Allison most voraciously enjoys a good opiumberry and sabertooth camel kidney pie between workouts.
That sounds delish!
Oooh, actually, do you have any blue-and-gold yolk pies? I could use a pick-me-up.
do I have WHAT KIND OF PIE SELLER DO YOU TAKE ME FOR?
of COURSE I have blue-and-gold yolk pies, madame.
Or I would, if that fat slitfaced bastard Sivnrx didn’t just buy all my uncooked bluegold eggs for the express purpose of hurling them at that harridan Fifth Daughter of a Silk Merchant’s clothing shop.
Good hunting to him, I say, but that’s somewhat irrelevant as you are without a pie to pick yourself up with. I can either give you a rain check certificate or a fresh-smelted sulfuric quiche?
Oh my god, Allison, it can’t be that hard to track down a metal pole and fix it to a doorway or something. You absolute mad lad.
*Mad LASS
Then again, Allison is known as the Rising KING, so do pronouns even matter anymore?
The state of Laddishness transcends mundane gender identity.
King is a job description; gender and sex are irrelevant to the royal.
Yeah this is a weird fucking place to do one’s pullups.
She totally does this to annoy the priest(ess).
Definitely.
The weight of Royalty is not to be borne by mere metal poles fixed to doorways.
Hey, if I could do chin ups off a dead goddess’ head I totally would.
Tunnel apes rule!
The snakes that share a space with said apes beg to differ.
WE’RE THE TUNNEL APES
Daily reminder that Alison will never sit on your face.
Why must you hurt us this way?
I don’t appreciate your lies.
why do you do that to me.
How terribly disappointing.
Why bother going on then?
Thank you for the reminder, and I must say that it is good to hear that. My beautiful face, with skin made of marble and eyes of ivory, is not to be sat upon. Now, if you told me I couldn’t bury my face in jewelry, then that would be cause for concern.
You dirty bastard. Why must you remind me.
Eventually, everyone goes into my mouth.
Everyone.
“Tunnel Ape” indeed! Don’t these fools know that “Plains Ape” is more accurate!? Honestly.
*laughs in Aquatic Ape Theory*
I actually believe “Mediterranean Ape” considering Pree Alison hails from a realm known as “Calif Or’Nia”
She’s from California, so mountain ape would be better?
That’s Pacific Ape, to you. The Mediterranean Basin is between Europe and northern Africa.
Eh, there’s been a few centuries of urban living.
LIES ALL LIES….We are actually Flat Apes.
is there some greater significance to her using that as her pull-up bar or is this one of those cases where pull-up bars were outlawed due to a combination of merchant guild shenanigans and the work of an obscure yet powerful cult, or is it both
A trick question. The merchant guild in question IS an obscure cult.
Such is life, in Throne.
“Do not affix exercise equipment in public places or causeways. Do not engage in activities obstructive to city traffic.” – Throne City Ordinance 1503:
“No metal piping structure shall be used in service of any function but the transportation of flame, fluid, and air, unless explicitly exempted by guild law or contract.” – Pipeworkers Guild By-law 390234:
“A martial artist worth his salt doesn’t settle for mere pull-up bars but only uses the remains of gods and his enemies. A real martial artist, of course, sees no distinction between the two.” – Hal Tho Mannok’s “Hardcore Guide to The Ways of Annilation and Tea”
There are surely more convenient, and less blasphemous, means of exercise, but one of the signs of ROYALTY is bowing before no one, not even the gods. And what better way is there to show one’s dominion over the divine than to get absolutely ripped exercising upon their corpses? That, I think, even Great Meti would approve of.
this is awesome, I love it
Perfect Tranquility amidst Conflict
Foolish Servant. The Successor is heir to all which that goddess created, and more. Were she alive, she would doubtless feel honored to aid the Rising King in her ascension, in whatever small way.
Oh yeah, I’m sure.
Just like she was super thrilled to help Zoss murder her servants and steal the power of the key.
Words of the wise: Yea, throweth not slurs at the crazy mofo performing one armed pullups upon the face of a dead god. For verily, they are a badass, and by their hand may deliver a swift end.
Ah, coin. Barter can ease tolerance into being like no other.
…And the skull of the garden-goddess remains peaceful, even now. May such remain so.
Buns that could C U T steel
There’s probably like a dozen other places Allison could be doing that. But I suppose defiling the relics of the gods just for the hell of it must be a necessary step in the path to True Royalty…
It worked for Zoss.
“Tunnel ape”…
Does that have any relation to the moniker “naked ape”?
Reach Heaven through pull-ups, Allison.
CAN’T be pull ups. Vectors ain’t right.
To climb the skull of YS-Bey is, it is proven, a lethal endeavor.
It was this way with her garden, which nothing of nature could survive.
Only in the unnatural could death grow like a treasured flower.
damn strange place to exercise.
Surely there are better places to exercise AL-YIS-UN
If you’re sitting off to one side in a deck chair and just watching, surely there are NO better places to exercise.
Muscile girls are awesome. GO ALLISON GET DAT BUFFNESS
“Hey, that’s insulting! I’m a crazy SAVANNAH ape!”
Reach Heaven through chinups!
But why?
Because she can.
inhale and your lungs are full
cross your feet and act the fool
as many reps as possible
Reach heaven through isometric exercise
join me at the windowsil
or forever be nintendo
(delightfully devilish)
We all know what soundtrack this scene needs to have…
She’s a BRICK
house
This one made me spit out my drink!
The chain that the the great skull of the goddess is still wearing is equally great in its density, it seems, for even the full weight of the rising king using it for pull-ups is insufficient to make it tighten!
So she is just using a dead Godess body/sacred object as gym equipment? That’s rather……not so nice, to say the least.
That is *quite* the musculature.
OUR AL-YIS-UN HAS FRIENDS IN THRONE NOW?! That’s delightful, I love this timeskip so much already, we simply must see more!
Just casually doing pull ups. Nothing to see here.
I love everything about this page. I can’t exactly articulate why or pinpoint the parts that make it great, but I love it.
“What can I say? Her face is very comfortable to do exercises on.”
Tunnel ape. How peculiar. I’ll remember it.
Other multiversal slurs for humanity:
Aesma-Kin
Charcoal-Souls
Sight-Apes(used by Goblins)
‘dem power hungry bastards
Good Eatin'(used by devils)
Swiftlings
Sh*t Flames
Aesma’s Mistake.
I have heard the term ‘double halflings’.
Alison is starting to look pretty buff there.
Geez louise, you could crush walnuts with those cheeks.
It is unwise to encourage such blasphemous desecration of the dead, after all you never know how your own remains will be treated.
I can think of worse uses for my body post-experation. Frankly as long as it isn’t being used to hurt the living I’m not sure I would care, being dead and all. I could see people who respected me in life being a bit upset, but that is unfortunately a “their problem”, not mine, since I’d be dead and all. And there are far worse things than someone getting use out of my face piercings.
I use mine as gambling currency.
As if “human” were not slur enough.
I’m curious how many times if any during the whole year we skipped that Allison went back to her world, maybe to do some laundry.
“Uhh who’s… armor… is this on the clothes line?”
our girl done got STRONQ
I bet she does her pullups here instead of on a bar because she can brace her forearm against the statue’s face. Maybe.
Hey Abbadon, I just noticed that the two short chains connecting the ornament to the top chain are missing. One is plausibly blocked at least partially by Allisons arm, the other would be visible.
I love the comic, 🙂 I simply noticed it since it appeared different from the previous page and was like ‘is that the same skull?’, other than Allisons body blocking the central ornament itself.
It’s also possible that she disconnected them to move them out of the way (can’t tell on the previous page if that’s even possible)
“If you didn’t give a free bowl of noodles to anyone who could do 1000 perfectly crafted one arm pullups, I wouldn’t need to deal with this!”
“And I didn’t have a giant rotting head next to a place that serves food I’d have more customers, deal with it.”
It’s been one human year, which is an eyeblink to some beings out there. Those that are powerful know that the Key is carried by a human mortal. Therefore it would be difficult to get a workout without people noticing.
Defiling a goddess head is the last place they would expect her to be.
You know, I was initially hoping she’d start using the face as a punching bag, but this? This is sooooo much better. And the fact that she’s been doing this REGULARLY as well. ALYISUN really has changed, and not just physically.
A wise warrior trains in the company of friends and a good meal. Truly Al-Yis-un has learned much in the last year.
…maybe…maybe don’t defile someone’s religion just so you can do some pull ups?
You kind of deserve those slurs Allison.
Pree Alisson
Huh
Reach heaven through reps
Pree AL-YS-UN, regular customer and heir appearant, flanked by the black and the white flames, warrior and weeb
Befoul….she took her shoes off!
Great, now I want to build upper-body strength using Christ the Redeemer.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but to this one, the monk and Oglod sound kind of like Korin and Mr. Popo.
I’m curious what “Pree” means in this context…
As I understand it, Pree is a general honorific for women/females. Preem is the corresponding one for men/males. Maybe it means that certain amount of respect as been accorded beyond the name-only condition.
It is the diminutive form of Preem.
That’s one way to learn not to fear the divine or pretenders thereto.
That seems like a really uncomfortable way to exercise- surely there are better options?
According to the next page, there are not.
There is a particular draconic slur for humanity, which I share here because it amuses me:
“Ke vhi-dar”, meaning “he who grows flowers”. The reference is to a garden in Paradise where angels tend the gardens mortals left behind (doing the useless for the beautiful so we don’t have to). It is also a pun on “ke Tau’nar”, meaning “he who multiplies War”.
The Tau’nar-ri (war-maker demons) have been in favor of this nickname for millennia now.
One might expect to lift her own slight body is no exercise for the Heir of the Conquering King. However, a student of relativity will recognize that for the King to be pulled up is for the Wheel to be pushed down.
Don’t forget. Believe in yourself. Not in the you who believes in me. Not the me who believes in you. Believe in the you who believes in yourself.
.
.
.
PIERCE THE HEAVENS.. USING DRILLS! VIOLENTLY!
Perhaps I’m slow, but I’ve realized something:
AL-YISUN
ALLISON
ALL-IS-ONE
I just love Allison’s evolution tbh.
Last time I checked the Goddess, She told me to have bliss with Al Is Un scraching her body over Her skull.
White Girl Privilege ACTIVATE!
“The measuring of a man happens when he is alone.”
Third Student of Bagoret – FBC, 06
While yes, the Goddess is likely not using that, it’s still a pretty rude move to use it for exercise, especially as it clearly bothers a nearby worshiper. If all you’re looking for is a pull up bar… that can’t be terribly hard to find.
Tis one doesn’t know about the rest of you, but to this one, the monk and Oglod sound like Corrin and Mr. Popo
Not if you want to get a cup at Throne’s Best Water-Based Stimulants afterwards. You have to bear in mind the whole picture, and not see actions in isolation.
Those of you who prefer blood-based stimulants might prefer a different god as an exercise wall.
Check your junk email folder – you may have missed the “No introductory payment, godly low monthly payments, free noodles” spam that went out last year.
I feel people are perhaps doing Alison a misservice here. Doing pull-ups on a bar improves your physical strength, but this isn’t a story about that. Doing pull-ups on the face of a goddess is different. Psyche is important here.
“Ah, superintendant Oglod, I was just, uh, doing some pullups, on the goddess-corpse! Isometric excercise! Care to join me?”
One imagines that there is a certain gravity attached to the skull of a Goddess.
anyone here understand the use of Pree in her name? From what i have gathered, its an honorific for Gods and the powerful…like Pree Aesma
Dont wanna be that guy…
But that thing looks more like a severed heat than a skull.
Thought:
Tunnel ape, and connection to the conventional way of humans giving birth – exiting a ‘tunnel’, as it were.
As opposed to demons or angels which just kind of like, coalesce. And numerous other species which would lay eggs, or binary fission, or other, less explicable methods.
Guns and buns…
If Al-Yis-Un is doing one-armed pullups, then either the chain she’s clinging to is welded into a single inflexible mass AND she’s working hard to keep her body vertical, or something else is wrong. Her center of mass is nowhere near underneath the point she’s suspending herself from.
If she’s practicing rock-climbing then she’s picked an easy face to traverse.
If she’s practicing annoying the neighbors, she’s spot on.
So, if Throne’s sun is broken, how does the shrine-keeper know it’s “evening”? And, if they have clocks, what are they setting them by?
Why does she have to climb the head to do the exercise?
Kill Six Billion Protein Shakes.
Hmm… Arturia Pendragon >> Allison, I am calling it. The reference is Fate Zero. There must be some kind of noble bloodline in Allison. Cannot just go from zero to hero in, err, days? Cannot even tell time in these dimensions either.
OH_OH, Gilgamesh (Fate Zero) >> Incubus.
I, for one, am appreciating her still going around barefoot. Nice job on the feet.